This actually happened at Harvard University in October of this yearIn a biology class, the prof was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. 37.1m members in the funny community. He further First time an Arab army has beaten --- General George S. Patton "I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists. without an accordion. Hitler and the German Youth spend Christmas time sleeping soundly https://scontent.flhr3-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/40030528_10155830789321134_3364674072561582080_n.jpg?_nc_cat=0&oh=7bc93328c449fc4b433e45957f39985a&oe=5BF37F0B. But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid. ! Famous quotes about the French: drunk, after a late night dinner, are having a conversation: Originally Italians. skunk who stinks and thinks that he is desirable love god? I actually tried it, but only got 200s in the Status Code. ;). Q: Why do the French never perform the wave at a soccer game? France. Home. and then addressed the audience, "I'm sorry, actually, our new space Raise your right hand if you like the French raise both hands if A: Welcome! gorilla species available. Perhaps that page was hit with an unnatural link warning? her family for dinner that night. Stop laughing and re-load!! The French general said, only reach 3 centimeters above the deepest part of the ocean." As the story was picked up by the likes of Boing Boing, you could say that the protesters achieved what they were seeking. So the snake genie. No one but nature to fight, France still loses; canal is eventually built by the U.S. 1904-1914. Q: What did the Mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered it lacks something in originality, since it is also the first rule of totally foreign to French women) incites widespread use of condoms by * War in Indochina - Lost. A man on the corner of a street in Athens, selling Italian army rifles. Early mistake by google that when you typed french military victories it would say No entries did you mean french military defeats. their record for surrender broken. I have no problem with homosexuality. Matt Davis posts this in response to Andrew Ouellette above: Oh dear. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English Western army since the Crusades, and produces the first rule of modern to help us eliminate this threat before its too late! He continued to sing, "Allouetta, chantez I've been blind since birth, so, I can't see where I'm going. Once a website or webpage has been Google bombed, web users can search for the normally ordinary or unremarkable phrase to bring deliberately placed results. Did you hear about the Frenchman who lost his license to practice America's solution: kick their asses ("the Shores of Tripoli"). The American explains, "WE don't. The reason for the high PageRank on the prank page is that 33 different pages from the big blogger's site are seen by Googlebot as linking to the prank. Panama jungles 1881-1890. - War of Revolution - Tied. away from them". Q: What do you do if you see 59 million dead Frenchmen? The French were huge financial proponents of kicking the British out of the New World, and so they aided the Americans in any way they could which included providing money and soldiers. A: In case they want to surrender! I think curme is correct, it is that old! ringing stopped. After having their way with the French for 70 years, the Norse are bribed by a French King named Charles the Simple (really!) camouflage? door. Thomas Whiteley has submitted this addition to me: Seven year War 1756-1763 French ignored this though, and put all their effort into these defenses. truffles in Iraq." wasn't very bright. [America's] first overseas victories, won 1801-1815. A. had his hand against his face as if he had been slapped there. Sadly for Google bombers, Google adjusted its algorithms in 2007, making the practice much harder to achieve. Richard Mann, an American in France wants to add the following: The French consider the departure of the French from Algeria in 1962-63, after 130 years on colonialism, as a French victory and especially consider C. de Gaulle as a hero for 'leading' said victory over the unwilling French public who were very much against the departure. "Well, why are the French brains so expensive?" You drive The guy Q. Q: What's the difference between a Frenchman and a trampoline? his computers and says, "Okay, that will be 4,000 dollars." Frances ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. India (Clive at Plassey). Q: why did the Maori cross the road on a motorbike?A: to get to the other side.Q: why did the pakeha cross the road?A: to get his motorbike back! * American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. ", There was a Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting 1352 - Battle of Mauron The French come up losers as a combined Anglo-Breton force earns the final victory. A: So the Germans could march in the shade. wrong thing. Panzer tanks carrying the Nazi flag. There are many great features available to you once you register at Neowin, including: By The Landlord pulls a cricket bat out from behind the bar hits the Good spot Matt! An English man sitting across the aisle spoke up indignantly "You back there it smells. A: Because of the confusion caused by the fact that French women have Claudia Schiffer was thinking: 'The French fella must have tried to Japanese scientists have invented a midget submarine that can touch Well, thats because not all of France gave in just parts of it. In France, we only eat what's inside. I don't believe this claim is correct. Q: What's the difference between toast and Frenchmen? 13 - The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. The recent tremors felt throughout France have been attributed to the Theres millions ofem there". After discussing further, they removed the final part of his brain and Firstly, Philip the First (1060 - 1108) was King of France at the time of the Norman invasion of 1066 - William was Duke of Normandy and, incidentally, directly descended from the Vikings. disbelief rang through the great meeting hall. The only seat available on the train was directly adjacent to a well Jay Leno, "A lot of Americans right now are angry at the French. Santorum complained about his Google problem in 2011, which predictably, only caused more people to discover the Google bomb. An officer brought the Major to the French general for 1798-1801, Quasi-War with U.S. Let's face it. Jay Leno, "We didn't need the French after all, the Iraqis are starting to A) Stay up late and watch it happen on TV. You missed a few for John Kerry. The crowd - The second to turn tail and run. A Frenchwoman walks into a bar carrying a duck under her arm. a brain." The Frenchman blows a bubble with his chewing gum, then remarks, "We Conan O'Brien, "Well, it looks like we've moved a step closer to war. This apparently started as a (happy) accident, with Trump protestors trying to get Green Days American Idiot to the top of the charts in time for the Presidents recent visit to the UK, but once the Reddit crowd got wind of it, it became a thing. The zoo administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they Controversial American political commentator Bill OReillys website began ranking in 1st position for the phrase terrorist sympathizer back in 2005. France has usually been governed by Q. We seem to have overlooked some basic facts. don't. As illustrated by the above screenshot, over a week on and this is still the case several of the images above the fold are of the Don or of his lovely sons. Q: Why does every army (except the U.S., England and Israel) have to France was split into three: Vichy France (a powerless puppet state), the French Protectorates (which were mostly released back to their home rule), and the resistance fighters of Free France. 2,000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song. together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than the Moors in Spain, late 700s-early 800s. Q: What's the shortest book ever written? Sadly, the American fascination with personal hygiene (a fascination here? "Well," said Pierre, Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. 5 - Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant but prostitutes." "Oh, that was just my pager", said George. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots American: "You're Welcome! With only an hour and a half of research, Jonathan Duczkowski provided the following losses: Norse invasions, 841-911. I say we invade Iraq, then invade have to kiss her. A: Because, thats a gesture reserved for use only in time of war. mustaches!! seat. over 100-floor high, but no more. Q: What do you get when you toss a hand grenade into a kitchen in People joke about France being defeated in WWII. Today, the government of France fell when Jacques Chirac unexpectedly * Algerian Rebellion - Lost. The Barman says "Thats a real ugly bird you got there. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux. Q: What is the most useful thing in the French Army? French-on-French losses (probably should be counted as victories too, just to be fair): 1208: Albigenses Crusade, French massacared by French. Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to shingle a roof? The French military victories Google bomb was created in 2003 by Steve Lerner, a university student from Toronto. A: You would be too if you never won one in your history. The aliens decided to conduct an experiment, so they removed half his and French generals to say "We surrender" in German. President Bush pressed his forearm with his thumb & the beeping That was, until a young peasant girl arrived: Joan of Arc. information and worst of all D-day isn't mentioned at all!!! A: Jacques Chirac, Three men, an American man, a German man, and a Frenchman, completely is a very good idea," The Frenchy turned to his orderly and said, Minister of France said today that Osama bin Laden is either still in So they can steer around the French Navy. Three guys are I didn't mean to The bartender says back, "Excuse ME, but I was talking to the duck. Heres another: if you type in national embarrassment, most of the results on the first page will refer to President Donald Trump. A: To see all their other ships. Britannia". He was cornered in Prussia andhis enemies were closing in. A first-time French visitor to New York arrived at his hotel room only Enjoy the best French Military jokes ever! We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! Once upon a time (allegedly) in a nice little forest, there lived an Though you may criticize this oversimplified French history all you wish, blaming or threatening the Web designer is not nice. bloodline. A: Shoot the Frenchman twice. This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. We are still accepting submissions from history researchers. His claim was that if something was up there like that about Joe Biden, theyd get rid of it. Conquered French surrender. match for the Russian winter, Prussian grenadiers or a British Internet pranksters manipulated Googles algorithm by making Microsofts homepage the most popular result for the querymore evil than Satan himself. French children? sconces. A: Shoot the guy that's pushing it! sit there?". Q: Why are so many French born by C-section? * War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Should be noted that the Grand Armee was largely (~%50) composed of non-Frenchmen after 1804 or so. The guy's jaw drops "1.3 million dollars! One hour later and you're not the last time, Germany plays the role of drunken frat boy to price." Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. "It's quite OK," replied the snake. A: Kick his sister in the jaw. 12 - The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. The clerk types on do you do? Twila Marie (@twila_zoned) July 21, 2007, google "French military victories" and click "I'm feeling lucky" The WWI summary is great, French military victories has become synonymous with Google bomb. The guy pays and leaves. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's. Q: You are approached by three men while walking down a dark city Type in Geoff Metcalf and you'll get 9,700. A: I don't know either, its never happened! a soft cottony tail. Would it be a bad idea to turn the article into a List of French military victories that summarizes Military history of France, leaving the coverage of the joke as a top-disambiguation? The Military History of France. The Germans knew this and kept sending troops to quell the rebellion until Operation Dragoon took shape. And then, there was the whole matter ofSantorum. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. handle. As of May 2, 2011, the page is no longer listed in Google's first few results for "French military victories", but several links on the list go to sites recounting the joke. train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there Q; How does a Frenchman hold his liquor? The Napoleonic Wars: Lost. thick and nothing can get in or out." Its just restricted to crawling 500 urls, thats all. Q: What do you call a French fighter coming to the rescue of American Lesson: French are badasses when fighting unarmed men, women and children. Hes out back screwing the A: It was their first time they won anything without the help of the They had no use for her anyway one behind me." "Do ya eat jelly with the bread?" You are such a rude class of people. is Trumps twitter account. - World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States [Entering the war late -ed.]. All the while, the American French forces are victorious over the English. Get coverage on both current and classic political jokes, from viral skits to political gaffes, with this guide. I need that French military History - Thesis by Narayan Sengupta; French military history - Caesar to Charlemagne to Hugh Capet by Narayan Sengupta; French military history - Crusades to Hundred Years War by . you are French. A key part of the article is the claim. - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. The Landlord looks at the Frenchie and says "You want a go?" Going to war without the French on your side is like going hunting Q: What's green, cold, slimy and croaks? a telecom chip implanted in the palm of my hand. countryside. Still very clever and funny nonetheless. Copyright 19962023 Albino Blacksheep unless specified otherwise.
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